“See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.”
— Hebrews 12:15 (NIV)
Devotional
Today we’re going deeper, and I won’t let you do it alone.
Yesterday, you acknowledged the pain. Today, we stop pretending it came out of nowhere. Because here’s the truth: what shows up on the surface usually has roots underneath it. Reactions don’t just happen. Triggers don’t come from nowhere. Patterns don’t form overnight.
It’s not about blame.
It’s about understanding.
You’ve been frustrated with the symptoms; your anger, your anxiety, your shutting down, your people-pleasing, your walls, but God wants to heal the source. Because if the root stays buried, the fruit keeps growing back!
Sometimes the root is something that happened long ago.
Sometimes it’s what didn’t happen.
Sometimes it’s what you were told.
Sometimes it’s what you believed to survive.
You didn’t choose the wound, but you can choose the healing.
Digging up roots is uncomfortable. It requires honesty. It requires slowing down. It requires asking questions you avoided because you were just trying to make it through. But sis, you’re not in survival mode anymore. You’re in healing mode now.
God doesn’t expose roots to shame you! He exposes them to free you!!
So today, we don’t rush.
We don’t judge.
We don’t condemn.
We simply ask, “God, show me where this really started.”
And whatever He reveals, He’s already prepared to heal.
Say it with me.. God is ready to heal me today!
You’re not too deep.
You’re not too broken.
You’re not too late.
You’re right on time for real healing.
Are you ready? You deserve this! Let’s go!
Love you to life,
-Pastor Joni
Prayer
Lord, meet me in the places I’ve been avoiding. Give me courage to feel so I can finally heal. Amen.
Reflection Questions
- What pain did I survive that I never gave myself permission to heal from?
- What mask have I been wearing to keep going—and what is it costing me?
- If I were completely honest with God today, what would I say hurt me the most?
8 Responses
The pain that I survived was my mother dying and my daughter getting molested by a close family member. Truth is I was so busy being in love with my sin/self that I pushed my mom away while being so mean to her & I neglected being a mother. I feel like a phony getting up everyday like I am this perfect person and being honest I just suppress my true pain leaving me unhealed & loathing myself because I’m dwelling on the past on things I could have done differently and that I cannot change now. The tears that I cry are tears of brokenness. I want to heal.
Jakayla I’m so sorry. Losing your mother is heartbreaking all by itself but walking through what happened to your daughter? That’s the kind of pain that can make you feel like you’re carrying a whole mountain alone. I want you to know: you’re not alone, and you don’t have to keep bleeding in silence.
And listen to me closely…what you just wrote is not you being a phony. That is conviction + grief + a mother’s broken heart finally telling the truth. The enemy wants you stuck in “I should’ve… I could’ve… I can’t change it…” but God is calling you into “I’m here… I’m honest… and I’m ready to heal.”
You admitted where you were wrong. That takes courage. But shame is not your punishment. Repentance is not God humiliating you—repentance is God rescuing you. There is a difference between accountability and self-hatred, and sis… God is not asking you to hate yourself. He’s asking you to come home.
And I want to say this too: the tears you’re crying? God doesn’t despise them. Those are healing tears. Those are the roots being pulled up. Because you can’t heal what you keep hiding.
Keep speaking up and letting it out! God’s got you and so do I!!
Love you big! – Pastor Joni
If I were completely honest with God today , what hurt me the most was loving people more than I loved myself, giving the unconditional love to others that I wasn’t receiving myself. But that’s over , I’m pouring all that into myself now and loving me more than ever.
Take that devil!!! Once you acknowledge and do the work.. life changes!! I’m so proud of you for pouring into yourself! Self love is the best love! Once that takes root, absolutely nobody can come in and give you anything less than you deserve!!
Love you big! – Pastor Joni
Being touch as a kid by my gray aunt husband,I want my sons to get they life line better that worry me so much,sometimes I think I fail my oldest son for being a teenager mom and my mother raise thank God for a mother like I have..
1. I survived losing 4 family members in 2019 + my miscarriages, April 30th 2025 (2 weeks after my bday) I survived my mom unexpectedly passing in her sleep, and I’ve survived losing friends after my mom’s death. I also survived feeling abandoned by my biological father and being raised by my father who isn’t my biologically my father. I’m grateful for my dad i love him like my own I just have anger towards the my bio dad for abandoning me.
1. The mask I wear to keep going is the mask of strength and that mask cost me support/help. I feel since I put this strong mask on everyone assumes I’m okay. When deep down I’m drowning, screaming, crying, and fighting. My mom was the only person I felt comfortable asking for help the only person and now that she’s gone it’s been hard for me to ask for help. I feel guilty asking my siblings because we all lost our mom and I’m not the only one who needs help.
3. If Im being completely honest with God today I would tell him what hurt me most is being forced to live through the pain of losing my mom.
The pain I survived is losing my mother! The wound is still fresh being that it has t even been a month I get a wave of emotions that come out of nowhere one minute im fine the next I broke down crying
I’ve been wearing the mask of “the strong one” storm sibling strong friend strong parent strong person overall. It is costing me peace! I wear this mask when in fact behind it I’m lost I’m here just surviving to make it to the next hour!
If I could be honest with God what hurt me the most is loosing my mom I know she no longer suffering but the human part of me can’t wrap my head around the fact that she is actually gone! And the parent I have left here never cared enough to build a genuine relationship with me!! I feel alone and angry! My mom NEVER got what she deserved in this lifetime!
What pain did I survive that I never gave myself permission to heal from?
What mask have I been wearing to keep going—and what is it costing me?
If I were completely honest with God today, what would I say hurt me the most?
1. My dad not being there for me as a kid
2. I pretended to be okay… it distorted my view of God because of that wound from my father not being in my life to protect me…. I am actively working on completely letting go of the pain so that I can raise my son from a healed place
3. Just feeling wide open like no one could protect me